advice

Poof. You Are an Adult: Embracing Minimalism

Hi Friends,

So during the months of October and November of 2016, I had the BIGGEST burden on my shoulders: I was packing my Atlanta life up and moving to Kansas City. As you know, moves are NEVER as simple or easy, but this move was a little trickier since I was moving from my very own 1 bedroom 1 bath condo to a 2 bedroom 2 bath condo.

My place. You’re probably wondering, “Whats the big deal? You now have another room and bathroom?” Although, the prior statement is true, the sheer size of my Atlanta place came with SO MUCH STORAGE SPACE. For example, I had a full size pantry, a walk-in closet, a linen closet, big bathroom with 6 pull out drawers, and a coat closet. Yup. I was cozy. Yup. I had filled everything up to the brim. Yup. I still used so many of those space bags for my seasonal clothes and linens.

His place. My husband’s place was nice. “Pent House” LOL. I mean it technically is the pent house, but by no means is it a pent house. It is just a regular unit in his building that is on the top floor. The view is great, the kitchen has an awesome large granite block to make preparing food and eating meals awesome and welcoming, we both have nice sized walk-in closets (same size as my old place) and we each have our own bathrooms. That being said, our bathrooms are super small, we don’t have the extra pantry or coat closet, and  both of the bedrooms are smaller. We use one room as the office and the other as our primary bedroom.

What’s the problem again? So the problem was/is that I had SO MUCH CRAP and I was keeping things for the sake of “keeping memories” or keeping clothes that I would “one day wear”.

Minimalism. One day out of know where it seems, along came this idea of cutting things down and minimalism. I probably stumbled across the idea of minimalism  when I Youtubed a de-cluttering my closet video, and then I became enthralled by them and needed to watch more and more. I, by no means, relinquished all of my goods, but I did let go of a SUBSTANTIAL amount of things.  It felt AWESOME.  Here is a list of reasons why I love MINIMALISM and why I hope you will embrace it as well:

  1. Unflattering. I have said this in a million other posts, but love those that love you, and get rid of those items that you do not love and that you do not love. What does this mean – it means, if you KNOW something in your closet is UNFLATTERING, then let it go.  Also, if something has bleach stains or holes in it let it go (super easy trick of initial letting things go).
  2. Commitment Phob Bag. If you are having issues letting go, get a nice brown bag or large plastic bag (even a garbage bag if you can’t find something that fits the bill for the earlier items) and place it in your closet. Go through your clothes that you haven’t worn in the past year or so, and literally put it in this bag, and tell yourself, that if you do not get it out of this bag within 6 months or a 12 months then you know its okay to donate.
  3. Declutter your closet. Declutter your life. When I was in college and later in life, and I always found the act of decluttering to be incredibly symbolic. When I faced tough situations in life (transitional phases), I would always clear out ANY AND ALL old reminders as a way for me to make room for new memories and new reminders. The process of letting it go physically, enabled me to let it go mentally.
  4. Be Selective. Next time you go shopping be INCREDIBLY selective about what you buy. I am SUPER into buying a few quality items (at a cost) that I will wear a 1,000 times, then buying a ton of cheap items that I will wear 3 times. I treat my clothes gently (AKA: cold water wash, hang dry, and only wash when needed). What is the point of having fast fashion & cheap items, when you only wear them a few times and then a month from now you’re like, “This doesn’t fit well”, or “After I washed it the items looks weird”. You’re better off buying something that LOOKS amazing on you, so that you know when you wear it you’ll look and feel your best.
  5. MAKEUP/SKIN CARE/HAIR CARE.  You do not need a million products. You don’t. Use what you have – FINISH IT ALL UP. Seriously – those dumb samples– just finish them – you don’t need to save them for a trip you’ll go on in 3 months and 3 days. If you do need the samples then, you can run out and grab them – but as for now finish your junk up. Also, MAKE UP PALETTES – I get that you want to own the latest palettes, but really think hard about the purchase before doing so. Like so many girls – I have enough palettes to where if any new palettes come – I could some how assemble it based off the palettes I’ve already purchased.  Make up goes bad – don’t do dumb impulse buys. JUST DON’T.
  6. Now that you have let stuff go. Don’t run to the store to fill up this space. Keep it empty. Did you know that the more stuff you have the more stress you feel. Keeping things simple, will allow you to be less stressed (its apparently proven). This is also great on your wallet too! I feel bad that I came to these realizations later in life, since I am pretty sure I could have saved my parents a nice chunk of change, had I come to this realization sooner.
  7. PRACTICE ALL OF THE ABOVE. You know, I don’t have the latest make-up products or the trendiest clothes, but I do have a staple camel colored cashmere vest that I love (and I will be wearing it 5 years from now), I have block heels that are comfortable and cute (I can wear them to work and out to a nice dinner), and I have the cutest quilted black bag (that will never go completely out of style). I am a classic girl (okay – some may say basic). Although, your counter may be, “I don’t want to be like everyone else” my rebuttal to you would be, “Your clothes are apart of your identity, and should not be your identity.”  You are so much more then the cotton, wool, cashmere, leather and polyester draped around your body, you have real thoughts and you can take real action – people should know you for your acts of kindness and generosity, and not the fact that you are sporting a cold-shoulder top this summer or will be showing some side-boob.  (DEUCES).

I have really enjoyed embracing minimalism. It is a lifestyle I am fortunate enough to choose. I know that if my husband and I ever fell on hard times, we would be fine and still look cute with all of our quality items

If you want to know more about minimalism, then feel free to check out the following YouTube videos:

  1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GGItVvYRKE4
  2. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t0dTdJTHTIk
  3. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TRClCeB_4ZQ

LOVE, PEACE & HAPPINESS,

Maheen

HI FRIENDS!

It has honestly been a minute since I last posted! I have a few important updates: I moved to Kansas City and I GOT MARRIED. Wild right?

I surprisingly really love Kansas City. I mean I will always be an ATLien, but Kansas City is one of those cities that is a hidden gem for the following reasons:

  1. It takes less than 30 minutes to get anywhere around town (more like 15-20 minutes – but saying thirty minutes since I had to drive across town to go to a girlfriend’s house and it took about 30 minutes).
  2. The rent prices are cheaper- ATL was about $300-$400 more for rent. Annual savings of about $4,800.00. Now who doesn’t like that??
  3. The food is yummy! The food in Atlanta is better simply because there are so many options, but for the limited options that are here, I would say KC isn’t doing that bad of a job.
  4. My husband is here 🙂

On that note, how did you meet your husband: I met the love of my life through a friend during the fall of 2015!  Something just clicked — I seemed to just enjoy talking to this guy for hours on end (and the whole time we were talking it felt like 15-20 mins, but then I’d look at the clock at it would read 1:00am). UMM WHERE DID THE TIME GO??? If you know me, I go to bed SUPER early, so this was different :).

The layers. I feel like getting to know him was like peeling an onion, so many layers, but each layer so awesome as the next. I couldn’t wait to tell friends and family members about him! He was awesome. Our families got involved and they took it from there.

It was EASY. Years from now when I tell my kids the story of how I met their father in more detail of course, I will tell them that being with him was EASY. I didn’t have to talk him into anything, change him, or wish I was different or he was different – I took him as he was and he did the same. I will tell them -we didn’t fight and each conversation and interaction was a loving one (granted we get into scuffles every now and but I can’t think of any “real” fights – THANK GOD).

Being married & what my relationship is like: It is great! I told my husband the other day, part of the problem of being so head over heels is that I cannot wait to come home to him and working big law means working big hours- LOL- I kid -my hours are not as bad as I thought they were going to be and this week especially as been awesome (hence the post).  Luckily, I married someone who supports me and my dreams, so he never complains or says anything about my hours. Rather, he encourages me take on more, wake up earlier and works by my side :).

Okay, I am writing all of this and he doesn’t even check my blog – since I put a DO NOT CHECK THIS SITE prohibition on him months ago, but if he does ever stop by I think he will be happy to see that I am happy to be his.

XOXO.

Health: My Favorite Morning Drink!

Hi Friends,

A fun fact about me is that I love sipping on things more than chewing things! I’m not sure why, but I love a yummy drink: carbonated, fresh juice, teas & coffees (I really don’t discriminate).

Lately, one of my favorite morning drinks has been 100% Bolthouse Farms Pomegranate Juice and chia seeds! (I’ve been purchasing Bolthouse over Pom Wonderful due to the price point. I’m sure if the POM Wonderful price point were better – I’d use either/or.)

I bought the Chia Seeds from amazon for $11  – you can find them anywhere though. At night (preferred method) or in the morning (least preferred method) I take a tablespoon or two of the chia seeds ad them let them soak in the pomegranate juice. By the time I wake up or am done getting ready for the morning –I have an awesome health drink ready for me!

The benefits of pomegranate juice are never ending, but here are some of my favorite benefits of drinking it:

  • may help stop plaque from building up in blood vessel
  • loaded with antioxidants (antioxidants are known to help prevent and repair DNA damage that can lead to cancer)
  • A 2005 study on 45 patients with coronary heart disease demonstrated that a daily drink of 238ml (8.4oz) of pomegranate juice administered over three months resulted in improved blood flow to the heart and a lower risk of heart attack
  • I’m anemic and the iron content is high in pomegranate juice!

I’m also really loving chia seeds – I’m sure you’ve read a million articles dedicated to these inflatable black seeds that turn all jelly-like, but once again here are my favorite reasons for loving chia seeds:

  • one tablespoon of chia seeds have more calcium than a glass of milk, more omega-3s than salmon, and more antioxidants than blueberries
  • high in fiber
  • may help prevent cardiovascular, neurological and autoimmune diseases

I hope you’re inspired to try the combination tomorrow morning, because it’s something I’ll definitely be enjoying!

Stay healthy! 

DIY MONDAY: Quick fix for MASCARA!

OH NO: Your mascara – it’s clumping – it’s dry- and YES this is the only bottle you have on hand. What will you do? YOU WILL NOT FREAK OUT or use this clumpy-product. What you will do is fix it.

I have two favorite ways to fix it. One con with both quick fixes is that the mascara tends to sweat a little more than usual (atleast for me) and with the coconut oil I seem to get a softer lash – but I end up seeing tiny particles of the product sprinkled around my check (sometimes).

CONTACT SOLUTION / EYE DROPS:

Warning DO NOT USE:  hydrogen peroxide care systems, such as CLEAR CARE® Cleaning & Disinfecting Solution, or any sort of generic brand. IT WILL STING YOUR EYE AND CAUSE OTHER ISSUES (frankly, all I know is something horrible will happen: so DO NOT do it!!)

But you can use your regular run of the mill contact solution.

Add in a drop or two of the solution into the tube then mix it and move the wand around in it  and you should get a consistency of mascara that is not clumpy. Instead of contact solution you could also use eye drops to do the trick as well.

COCONUT OIL:

I secretly love the coconut oil method. As stated above I get softer lashes and the product in my mind seems “richer” and just better. Obviously, only put a little bit of coconut oil in the tube and then just swoosh it around.  Adding a little bit of coconut oil will allow you to probably use your tube of mascara for another 4-6 days. If you’re wondering how you can use this tip in the winter when coconut oil is in a thicker form: simply take a small glob of it in your hands and it should melt relatively quickly and just funnel it in to your tube!

Do you have any quick fixes? I’d love to hear them! 

Dating: 11 tips to take it to the next level.

I’m NO pro at dating, but I do have a few fool-proof tricks up my sleeve. I would love to share them with you — so you can you snag “Mr. Right” and leave “Mr.  Okay-for-Right-Now”.

  1. If he loves you, likes you or is interested, he will make time for you.
  2. Don’t initially bombard him with texts and calls, keep it short and simple. You don’t want a cyber relationship– you want a REAL one: ditch the long texts or phone calls for hanging out in person, grabbing coffee together, or going for a stroll.
  3. Talk about outdoorsy activities that you enjoy — if he is paying attention, he’ll plan something around it on your next date because he knows that it’s a fail-proof date idea.
  4. Let him pay. You do not need to prove yourself — and you should always offer, but if he insists then let him. You want a partner who will take care of you — then it starts with this small gesture. You’re job is to look pretty and be good company. His job is to open doors, pick up the check , and be there ON time. After the third date, or even the second date you can pick up the dessert tab, pick up your lunch tab or make him something special!
  5. Take it slow, for the first two months. See each other once or twice a week, nothing more (this is what SLOW means)!
  6. Don’t act like your married  if you’re JUST dating or don’t act like he is your boyfriend when all you’ve done is go out on a date.
  7. If you’ve been hanging out for a while (one month or more) and you both really like each other or you like him, then ask him “where is this going?” or “what is going on between us” — it’ll definitely take courage, but if he says I don’t know or he wants to be friends, then the balls in your court. You can continue to hang out, cut him out or not feel guilty about meeting other people.
  8. Remember you’re single until he is actually your boyfriend & he is single until you’re actually his girlfriend: girls often get upset that this guy did them wrong, blah blah blah blah blah — my first question is: did he know the parameters of your relationship? “Ummm kinda, we didn’t talk about it — it was understood”  If this is your answer, then make it clear to him that this is what you thought, and ask why he didn’t think that? If you it’s a reasonable excuse, then set boundaries, so you know you’re on the same page, if it’s not a reasonable reason– LEAVE HIM. Don’t open the door again. Bye.
  9. Be simple. Don’t be demanding & don’t change his date ideas. Go along for the ride with a smile, and appreciate the time he put into planning the date!
  10. THE MOST IMPORTANT TIP: DO NOT BE A LAST MINUTE SORT OF GIRL.  You’re time is valuable and he should know that! He should plan his dates with you well in advance. For example, if he wants to go out on Friday, he should tell you by Tuesday! You want him actively thinking about you and your date through out the week, you want him to work for you and dwell on you.  As you date for a longer period of time, then it’s okay to do things on a last minute basis — because who does like the spontaneous girl!
  11. Be confident. You’re beautiful: inside and out. Don’t feel insecure  — think about how luck you are — there are girls that are being sold somewhere? People who find the internet to be a LUXURY, people  who have no one to use this tricks on! So trust me girl you’re lucky.  You have eyes to read this, and common sense to interpret it — TRUST ME. Be thankful, smile and “fake it till you make it.”

Organization: Not just applicable to your closet.

There is a lot going on in my life at the moment. I have finals to prepare for, personal issues consuming my thoughts, a condo that needs to be organized, and a kitchen that needs to be stocked.

Unlike the pleasant Atlanta weather, my life is not so pleasant at the moment. I have had two weeks to reflect on certain circumstances and I have come to the conclusion that: I could be a pessimist, or I can be an optimist, the choice is MINE. I choose to be an optimist, because  the bright side, allows me to be more useful with my time, helps me get back on track, puts me in a pleasant mood, and allows me to project my happiness in others, which in turn, allows them to project their happiness upon me.

I cannot hide from my  issues, or push my issues under a rug, but I can delegate the mental stress  I devote to each issue and the order I decide to stress about each particular issue. So for example, my second year final exams are my first priorities.  Second, When I get spare time, I should go grocery shopping, stock my fridge. Third, I need clean my apartment. I do not need to do an IMPECCABLE job, but I do need to clear the sink, wipe down my counters. After attacking these issues, and after my exams are over, I will stress about issues that will affect my mood & things that if dealt with right now, would cause me to devote less than 100% towards studying for my exams.  After my exams are done, I will tackle them, surfacing/dealing with them now, will seriously just be a waste of time, and could potentially jeopardize my ability to perform well on my finals.

I hope you are not dealing with anything to serious, but if you are — remember choose to be an optimist. Delegate your time accordingly. Only love those that love you, and try to put on a fake smile, even if you feel like this is the WORST DAY EVER. It will get better, and smiling is the first step — I promise.

Love.

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